Let Em Coach...Mom and Dad!

We as parents, perhaps like our parents in many ways but certainly not like our grandparents, seem to step into each new season not with the anticipation of watching our kids grow, mature and experience a piece of their childhood. Rather we look for ways to criticize, complain, compare and try to convict the coaches if they display what we feel is not the best for our kids too quickly. "He yelled awful things at the kids"... "He told my kid he couldn't play because he's not good enough right now or trying hard enough". What! I can't believe another adult told my kid that and I need to say something... Think about it, most of us tell our kids that everyday at home but we just don't want to hear a coach say that to OUR kid. Have you ever said.. "Why are you always teasing your sister, you are driving us all crazy and you're not listening"... "You can't play Xbox or tweet until your grades get better, the effort in school is just not good enough". Coaches are just trying to get the most out of our kids at that moment, just like us at home. Let em coach.

Most of us had a youth, high school or college coach make an enormous impact in our life's. I hope as you read this you are thinking of that coach right now and all the honest, hilarious things that they said to you, about you and how you will never forget those classic one-liners. Don't think too much on what you may hear your kids coach say, because I guarantee that is has a different meaning to them as it does to you. Let em Coach.

I am thinking of the coach that made the biggest impact on my life; Coach Bert. In today's parent/coach higher suburban standards, he most likely would be run out of most suburban, country club, entitlement communities today where lawsuits against coaches have become a hobby for parents.

Coach Bert not only yelled, pushed, pulled, tore us down, build us up, he got everything he could from thousands of 15-18 year old knuckleheads over 30 plus years coaching. His style today would be deemed harsh, inappropriate, crude and maybe unprofessional but we loved it and him. Not only would he smoke, swear, spit, scratch and scream...he told us amazing stories about life, former players and interesting people he has met in his life.  Most of all he told us the truth about ourselves, the good and the bad.  It didn't matter if we liked to hear it but kids know and accept the truth.  Not sure what our parents thought of Coach Bert at the time but they didn't seem to care because all we talked about at dinner...was Coach Bert. Most challenging moments in my life today, I take a piece of him with me knowing that everything in life is not always going to be easy and that I DON'T get an award for just showing up! As coach use to tell us..."If your mother doesn't like what I am telling you, tell her that I knew her since she was your age and believe me she wasn't an angel either"!  Let em Coach.

The lessons that our kids learn today will be valuable lessons that not everyone is going to be the star, not everyone is going to get into the game and most of all they will not like every coach or teacher ...they will carry that lesson with them when they have bosses that they loath or love. If we try to fight every battle for them now with lawsuits and convictions, they will never learn to fight their own battles and more importantly figure out how to work with the tough coaches and embrace the great ones. They have to figure that out on their own.  Let em Coach.

My point is that as we analyse the coaches from the sidelines this weekend in our Target Lounge Chairs with retractable roofs, drinking our $10 Starbucks Half Cafe Half Seaweed Lattes let's just put it all into perspective. There are kids around the world the same age as our kids who are scared, fighting in wars, providing for their families and wondering the streets without any hope of playing at dad's member guest golf tournaments....let alone get into a middle school lacrosse game.

Let em Coach....I am glad my parents did.   

Rob Thompson-Managing Partner
North American Sports Group

Rob is owner/operator of 100+ youth and elite tournaments, former Director of Activation for the Disney Media Group and event manager for the NFL Youth Development programs.

rthompson@nasportsgroup.com / www.grassrootsportsnetwork.com